Yet Another Poem About Butterflies

I don’t do this on pur­pose, you know. I don’t just sit down with the express pur­pose of writ­ing poems about but­ter­flies, though as a job that would be really excel­lent. This one was inspired by a com­ment from my friend Alice that I am a Jew­ish but­ter­fly. I am neither Jew­ish nor a but­ter­fly, Alice. This is why:


It would be easy
To be Jew­ish
If I were a but­ter­fly;
But­ter­flies don’t eat pork
In the first place and
Their sperm ducts
Have no nerve end­ings
So cir­cum­cision wouldn’t
Be a prob­lem and
But­ter­flies die soon after mat­ing
So they’ll remain loyal
To the end but I have
Lots of nerve end­ings
And love bacon
And think girls are hot
So I wouldn’t be
A very good Jew.

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